by James K. Sayre
7 March 2004
Try our new amazingly effective home remedy called Bush-be-Gone® just once and you will be totally satisfied.
Bush-be-Gone® - aerosol spray form:
Available in aerosol spray form for ridding your home of that awful old Bush stench, which has been lingering for several years now. The old stench is replaced with a light floral scent. Applied to newspapers and magazines, it destroys the offending images and text in a couple of seconds and replaces them with restful natural scenes.
Bush-be-Gone® - software form:
Available in software form for ridding your computer and your Internet search results of annoying old Bush images. Available for Windows, Macintosh and Linux platforms.
Bush-be-Gone® - TiVo form:
If you are currently using the TiVo television recording system, you will be very happy to know that you can use Bush-be-Gone® in our especially formatted TiVo software format. Just download it to the TiVo operating system, and magically it will delete all those awful smirking Bush images which you've learned to detest over the years. The Bush images will be replaced by restful natural scenes with appropriate light classical music backgrounds.
You will be thrilled with the complete effectiveness of our with Bush-be-Gone® line of home use products. You will be relieved to never again having to see and hear the Bad News Bush. If you are not completely satisfied, just return the Bush-be-Gone® products, along with the register receipt for a prompt and complete refund.
These fine products are available at better stores everywhere in continental United States, as well as Alaska, Hawai'i, Guam, Puerto Rico and the Virgin Islands. Also available on the Internet at: www.Bush-be-Gone®.com or write to Bush-be-Gone®, Post Office Box 911, Allhat, Texas 54321. Or just call 800-bushbgon (800-287-2663).
Coming soon, a national version of Bush-be-Gone®. It will be available in voting booths everywhere in early November, 2004, so be there or be square. We're gonna flush this nightmare down the drain once and forever, and sure 'nough, Bush will be gone...
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Web page last updated on 6 February 2005.